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Thursday, September 29, 2011

Life as a single mom


I officially have a new respect for single moms!

What do I mean? Well, my husband had to go to San Francisco for a 4 day business trip this past week and boy did I miss him. Now of course I love my husband and I always miss him if he has to go out of town. If it happens to be that time of the month, I may even shed a few tears when he leaves but usually it is not that big of a deal when he has to travel. This week was a completely different story.

Being left at home with a 4 week old by myself was something that I will never ever forget!!! Let me give you a recap of my last few days. John abandoned left us on Sunday at 5:00am. That day went pretty smooth until the evening rolled around. Josselyn decided to get fussy around 7:00pm and then she decided to stay fussy until bedtime. I fed her and put her down at about 11:00pm, I figured that I was in the clear for the next 3 hours and then she would wake up to eat and then she typically immediately falls back asleep for another 3 hours and then she wakes up to eat and the cycle repeats itself for basically 24 hours lol (occasionally she may go 4 hours but then she will be sure to make up for that lapse in time and only go 2 hours before her next feeding). Well, Sunday night Josse woke up at 2:15am to eat, so I fed her like usual. After she ate I went to lay her back down in her bassinet when I noticed something odd....she was WIDE AWAKE! Usually after she eats she falls into a deep sleep but this kid was as wired as could be. I tried to do the good mom thing and rock her (that did not work) then I tried walking around and patting her (that did not work) then I decided to lay her next to me in bed (I guess that offended her because she started screaming bloody murder). To make a long story short my little angel baby decided to cry and fuss from 2:30am-5:30am!!! Now had John been there I would have woke him up, despite him having to work in the morning and I know he could have done something to calm Josselyn down or at least he could have kept me from falling apart (there is something terribly wrong when both mommy and daughter are crying in the rocking chair) lol. But John was in California and I was in Texas...ALONE! 

Lets skip to Tuesday another memorable day. Things started off ok. Josselyn and I had to go to the church for Masters Commission's "Meet the Staff" & then a church staff meeting. She actually slept for two hours there (which is normal...she typically takes three or four 2-3 hour naps a day!) Well after we left the church at about noon things went terribly wrong. I fed Josselyn and after that she normally knocks out for a couple hours but on Tuesday Josselyn decided to NOT SLEEP the entire day! This is not normal for my child. I could not get her to nap for more than 15 minutes the entire day!!! She just fussed and fussed and fussed. I seriously felt like I had lost my mothers touch :( My girlfriends could calm her down more then I could!!! (and that does not sit well with a new mom) Well the evening rolled around and we had to go to Invictus our college service. Lets just say I was running late because Josse wanted to eat longer than usual. I ended up having to cut her "dinner" short and that made her extremely mad (I know, I know that's awful). Well as I was about to walk out the door I noticed that she had a dirty diaper so I stopped to quickly change her on the couch (BIG MISTAKE). As I was changing her she decided to start peeing everywhere!!! Yes she peed on the couch, on me, on her cute outfit, everywhere & I was already late as it was. I started to panic & I was too scared to change her clothes because she was already screaming & when she is worked up and I change her clothes it makes her even more mad so I left her in PEE PEE CLOTHES (what on earth was I thinking?!?!) So I have a daughter socked in pee who then cried the whole way to church. Oh yah and my poor child developed a diaper rash so that may have added to the reason why she was so mad (at this point I felt like a total unfit mother). Once we got to church I quickly went to the meeting I was supposed to be at 15 minutes earlier. After the meeting I went to try and calm down my child before our Invictus service started. I knew I had to feed her again since the poor child was still hungry! Once I finished feeding her I stood up & she spit up everywhere! It was on her already pee pee clothes (which were black!) I tried to clean her off but it was near impossible :( Well, Josse was fussy all service and then the entire way home. Once we got home I was beyond frazzled so I called my mom to come over and help me! Luckily my mom has a special touch with Josse...so she bathed my child who was a complete mess and she tried to calm Josselyn down. By about midnight mom had Josse sound asleep (or so we thought). My mom left, I was sound asleep, and Josselyn was in her bassinet. Unfortunately within 15 minutes Josse was crying again! Luckily my mom came back over and was able to really get Josselyn to sleep this time (I know it's pretty pathetic that my mom had to help me put my daughter to sleep!) I swear that I usually do great at calming Josse down and putting her to sleep. I think that something had her upset; maybe it was the fact that she had not slept at all that day, or it could have been the diaper rash, or maybe it was the pumpkin spice latte I had that morning that was not decaf, or it could have been the ice cream I ate that did have some chocolate in it...who knows. 

The next day was not quite as bad although my house looked like a zoo! If you saw my living room you would laugh. I have the top of the line new and improved MaMa Roo swing sitting out as well as the $60 old school "whip lash" swing from a garage sale. I seriously use both!!! Then I have a pink play mat sitting out that she likes to stare at (for about 10 minutes) as well as her Nap Nanny which she actually likes quite a bit (if I put her in it when she is asleep) lol. Then there is my outdoor white rocking chair! Yes...outdoor rocking chair not indoor rocking chair. You would think that Josselyn would like her custom made, cream, paisley glider that is sitting so nicely in her nursery...but for some reason my daughter prefers the Cracker Barrel wooden rocking chair that is meant to go outside on the front porch, not in my living room!!! Basically my living room is a disaster and that is very difficult for an OCD clean freak like myself :(

Well, some how we got through those 4 days without John (although it was not easy). It is amazing that the night John comes home Josselyn sleeps for 5 hours straight and is back to being a little angel during the day lol Maybe she was fussy becasue she was missing her daddy...who knows! But like I said at the beginning of this blog, I have a new respect for single mom's! How do they do it?!?! I could barely make it through those few days and I only have 1 child, my mom lives down the street and I had friends at the house helping me (I think I may be a total wuss). The bottom line is that it is not an easy task being a mama and babies are no joke!

With all of that said, I once again have a new appreciation for my husband!!! Things are so much easier when he is around and I am not a total basket case. I am hoping and praying that he does not have any more work trips any time soon...


In her cute outfit before she peed & spit up
But like I have said before I wouldn’t trade being a mom for the world!

Grandma coming to the rescue to bathe poor dirty Josse! lol

Monday, September 26, 2011

1 Precious Month


You're gonna miss this…
As I look over at my precious baby girl sleeping, I cannot help but get sad that she is already 1 month old today. It seems like just yesterday I was complaining about how big my belly was and how uncomfortable pregnancy was lol. Actually it seems like just last week that I surprised my husband with a Willow Tree figurine that said “New Dad” & gave him a card with a positive pregnancy test in it. Basically time has just flown by. 
 
I am not sad because my little baby girl will one day grow up I am sad because babies have a way of making you realize how fast the clock really is ticking. If you're not careful and if you let the “busyness of life” stress you out and keep you constantly going, going, going (which I personally have a tendency to do) then one day you will stop and open your eyes and realize that a year has flown by or two or three! I am glad that the Lord has been teaching me to slow down and truly cherish every day not only with my daughter but with my husband, my family & even my friends. You may not always have your loved ones in your life and it would be a shame to take for granite the time you do have.
I am not trying to write a sad/sappy blog. I guess for the first time ever my little princess has shown me how precious every day is and I now truly understand what it means when people say you can never get that “time” back again. Josselyn will grow older each day (which I have to eventually accept) lol But I know I will LOVE every milestone I have with her. I cannot wait until she laughs for the first time, or says her first word, or takes her first step. It will also be amazing to be there when she asks Jesus into her heart for the first time. One day I will have to take her to her first day of school, be there for her first recital and maybe even her first soccer game ;) Time won't stop there she will have her first boyfriend, first kiss, first car and even one day get married.
I say this all to say that I want to make a promise to enjoy every day, cherish every moment and not let the busyness of life distract me from what really matters. Yes I get a bit emotional that my precious baby girl is getting older by the minute but I know I will absolutely love every chapter of her life! So in a way it is sad yet exciting all at the same time.

My little princess 1 month old

Daddy's little girl


I head a quote once that said,  
"Minutes are worth more than money. Spend them wisely" 


"Your Gonna Miss This"
What a beautiful true song

Saturday, September 17, 2011

Daddies & their Little Girls


WEEK 3 


This past week was our 1st week without daddy at home :( John had two weeks off of work (thank God!) but unfortunately for us he had to go back to work on Tuesday. Now let me just say that I did not realize how helpful it was to have daddy at home with us! You see like most newborn's our tiny tot likes to eat every 2-3 hours. Now during the day that is not such a big deal (except for the fact that my social life has been put on hold & I am beginning to wonder if it will ever resume lol) but I can handle the day time feedings. Now night time is a totally different story.

3 weeks old

For the first two weeks every time Josselyn woke up at NIGHT John shot out of bed and changed her diaper (which was always wet or dirty) then he brought her to me to feed. All I had to do was feed her for 20-30mins (and surprisingly you can do this half asleep!) and then when she was done daddy would burp her, change her diaper again, swaddle her back up & then put her back in her bassinet. This honestly made my job quite easy (besides the fact that I am still getting use to being somebody's food supply). Anyway, our great system came to a halt when John had to return to work. There is no way on earth that I would even let John get up throughout the night when he already has to be up at 5:00am and in downtown Dallas by 7:00am. Now my husband is so amazing he seriously tried to figure out how he could do one of the night time feedings if I pumped. Just the fact that John thought of that gave him major brownie points but like I said he has to be up way to early to  even think of doing anything besides sleeping during the night. So needless to say this past week has been quite rough throughout the nights. Poor Josse now gets fed while I am still laying down and then I fall asleep so ummm... she doesn't get her post-feeding burp or diaper change and she no longer gets re-swaddled and placed back in her bassinet. Now don't freak out; in less then 3 hours Josselyn wakes up hungry again (mainly becasue I fell asleep during her last feeding so she only ate on one side & if you know my kid that does not hold her over for long!) anyways this time around it is early morning so I am at least half awake so I do change her diaper, properly feed her (on both sides) and afterwords she even gets burped and another diaper change if needed! So I am not a totally negligent mother lol. All of this to say we really miss having Daddy's help!!!


Now this past Tuesday I figured that since Monday night was so rough Tuesday morning would be a breeze (BOY WAS I WRONG). I didn't realize that since Josselyn was now  2.5 weeks old she would start having more "AWAKE" time. Instead of just eating & sleeping my little princess is actually awake for 30-45 minutes between feedings & naps. Now you would think that this is a good thing (which it partially is) but my little angel is still trying to figure out what to do during this "awake time" & last Tuesday she decided to just CRY!!! I tried everything and each attempt held her over for about 10 minutes. The real issue may have been that Josse was missing her daddy just as much as me lol ;) Anyways we had a rough start to the week but once John came home tiny tot decided to turn into a little angel (for some reason she likes to save the fussy time for mommy lol) Anyway, Tuesday made me realize how incredible my hubby is & how much I miss having him at home with me. Now the rest of the week did get better Josse was not fussy every day, she now likes to pick about 45 minutes each day to be fussy...but that's about it. I am convinced that she is still figuring out what to do when she is awake and not eating (becasue eating is her absolute FAVORITE thing). My mom purchased another baby swing, a baby bouncer and a baby rocker lol so surely one of those items will come in handy during this new "awake" time...we will see!


safe & sound in her daddy's arms


Now I do have one last complaint (ok it is not a real complaint exactly...)
But I do want to know why Josselyn ignores all my attempts to calm her down when she is fussy! She doesn't care if I walk around singing, or if I bounce her, or sway her, or rock her in the rocking chair, or make funny faces...everything is useless! Now when daddy comes along & picks her up and holds her out swaying from side to side...I call it the manual MamaRoo (the MamaRoo is the crazy high tech swing Josselyn has). Anyways the moment that John starts swaying Josse side to side she is completely quite & 95% of the time she falls asleep! How come daddy has this magic touch?!? I think that there must be some kind of special touch that only daddies have :)

doing the MaMaRoo

The more I thought about it, the more I really believe that daddies do have a special touch. You see there is something that is calming and comforting about dad's. When you are in their arms you feel safe, protected & completely secure. I know that anytime I was in trouble or needed comfort I could go straight to my dad. He would do anything for me & he had this one of a kind unconditional love for me that I knew was unwavering. When I look at John I see that he has that exact same kind of love for Josselyn. It is absolutely priceless to watch the way he looks at her and then see that way she gazes back at him. He can calm her when she is upset, he has that special touch that can keep her from crying. It is the beautiful father/daughter bond that God created. I will say that watching John & Josselyn does bring up a lot of emotions for me. It does make me miss my daddy and wish that he could be here to meet his granddaughter & see me become a mom. It is hard to enter this new chapter of life & have my dad gone. I really feel like the last big chapter I walked through was getting married and becoming a wife & thankfully my daddy was there for that; so it is hard not having him be here as I walk through this new chapter of become a mother. Even though waves of sadness have come I do find comfort in knowing that Josselyn is going to have just as incredible of a daddy as I had. She is going to have a father who loves her unconditionally, who would do anything for her & who thinks she is the world. I love knowing that my daughter will always be taken care of by her daddy.

My Daddy & Me

John & Josselyn

I guess you could say that this week I was re-reminded of the beautiful relationship between daddies & their little girls. I was blessed to have an amazing man as my father & my daughter is blessed to have just as an amazing man as her father. 



Some things is life are truly priceless



This song captures the love between Daddies & their Girls
 
My Daddy & I danced to this song at my wedding

Monday, September 12, 2011

Josselyn's 1st Photo Shoot "Newborn Pictures"

Baby Pictures...
 



In my opinion there is nothing more precious than newborn baby pictures. I love their tiny fingers, tiny toes, tiny tooshies, little rolls and innocent faces. Newborn babies are simply the cutest thing ever! Throughout my pregnancy one of the things that I was the most excited about was Josselyn's newborn baby pictures. I just Looovvvee naked baby girls with BIG BOWS on their head (I am sure that does not surprise y'all!) Anyway, I have been excited about Josselyn's newborn pictures since...well, before she was even born!
 








Now I was not quite sure how life with a newborn would be so I decided to schedule the pictures 2 weeks after Josse was born. At the time I figured a 2 week old would be easier to photograph then a 1 week old (I was obviously clueless about newborn babies). It probably would have made no difference when Josselyn's newborn pictures were. It actually might have been better to do them when she was a week younger because she slept non-stop that week! Anyway, the pictures did not quite go how I imagined...










Things started off GREAT! The photographer arrived at our house and Josselyn was sound asleep. It is a lot easier to work with a sleeping baby so we started immediately. She took the most precious pictures of Josse naked on our bed. They turned out sooo precious! Things were going perfectly until our sweet little princess decided to PEE all over our bed!!! Yes folks Josselyn peed all over our leopard blanket while she was sleeping lol












Well after the peeing incident we took some sweet family pictures with Josse and our two pups Sugar & Candy on our bed. Josselyn was back asleep at this point and she was much better behaved then both of our dogs. Luckily we did get some cute pictures (you may be seeing one of these shots on our Christmas cards this year!) ;)












Next, the photographer wanted to capture some natural, candid shots with John and myself interacting with the baby. At this point Josselyn was wide awake but luckily she was behaving quite well! The photographer had John hold Josse, talk to her, and kiss her sweet face (these are some of my favorite pictures). It was my turn next...I held my precious little girl and kissed her all over. Well while I was holding my beautiful, NAKED baby Josselyn decided to...ummmm....projectile POOP all over me and the floor! This poop shot out a good 3 feet and it got every where. It was on my dress, the blanket, the rug & the carpet! It was absolutely disgusting and it definitely slowed down the photo shoot.











It seemed like after the projectile poop incident things only got worse! Little princess decided that she was starving even though she ate 2 hours before. Josselyn was crying non-stop so I had to stop and feed her (let me remind you that we paid for a half session so we were only supposed to have 45 minutes and Josselyn wanted to waste time eating!!!) I thought I could just give Josse a little snack instead of a full feeding (BIG MISTAKE) so after she ate a little bit we went down stairs to continue the photo shoot.











I was really excited about the last part of the session. The photographer was now going to take pictures of Josselyn in a few of her tutu's and some cute naked pics of her in a big metal bucket with fun bows on her head. Well ... since Josselyn was not completely full so she decided to keep crying. We tried putting her in the metal bucket and this child screamed bloody murder! She was not about to put on a tutu, a hair bow or be put in a metal bucket. She was done with pictures and was not going to cooperate. Let's just say the photo session ended there :( No tutu pictures or bucket pictures. I was really disappointed at first but as soon as I saw the photos that the photographer did take, I fell in love with them and the tutu pictures no longer mattered ;)







Well that is the story of our photo adventure. I will say that the pee, poop & crying baby were all worth it for the beautiful pictures we will have to cherish for the rest of our life. I did learn from this experience that things never go as planned when there is a baby involved. Unfortunately I think I am on Josselyn's schedule more than she is on my schedule :)












P.S The photographer took some beautiful pictures of Josselyn's nursery, so I figured that I should share with yall :)












*Photos by Stephanie Davis Photography

Saturday, September 10, 2011

2 WEEKS OLD!

September 9, 2011


WOW...Today my little princess Josselyn Grace Alcala is 2 weeks old!

Daddy loves taking pictures of his princess

I can not believe how fast these last 14 dayS have gone by. It is absolutely amazing how much my little princess has changed and grown in the past 2 weeks. Sometimes I wish I could just freeze time because the days seem to come and go way to fast!

Josselyn at 2 weeks old!
Well...my last blog was about the labor and delivery of little miss Josse. So today I am going to give you all a little update on what has gone on since the birth of our precious little girl....

After Josselyn was born we spent 3 nights at the hospital. Unfortunately becasue they did have to use the vacuum to help me deliver Josselyn she developed jaundice. She was high risk for jaundice due to the breakdown of red blood cells in her head from the vacuum suction. Basically this causes a subsequent production of bilirubin. Anyways because of this Josselyn had to spend 2 days and 2 nights under this crazy light. It was horrible becasue we were not suppose to hold her unless I was feeding her. This made no sense to me becasue in every child birth prep class I took they emphasized how important skin to skin contact is in the first few weeks, yet all of a sudden I was supposed to leave my kid practically naked in this clear fish tank looking bowl with these awful goggles covering her eyes and this bright light shining in her face!!!! Ummm NO WAY especially since Josselyn screamed and cried every time we put her in the fish bowl. How is a baby who spent 10 months crammed up in a dark uterus supposed to feel comfortable all sprawled out under some bright light??? Luckily one amazingly nice nurse told me that If she were me she would just hold that baby and put the light over me and the baby. So we took her advice and for 2 days our family & friends all rotated holding Josselyn in our laps with the light above us (don't worry most of us wore sunglasses). Unfortunately most of the other nurses made us feel completely stupid for not just leaving Josselyn in the fish bowl. They made comments about how they couldn't believe she was being held all day and I better be careful not to spoil her (SHE WAS ONLY 2 DAYS OLD!!!). I ignored the comments and we continued to love on & comfort our little newborn even if it meant sitting under a light. We are sooo BLESSED that we have so many amazing friends and family who were excited to just sit there and hold Josselyn (even if it was under a UV light lol).




Well Monday August 29th was a WONDERFUL day. Not only was that John's 28th Birthday but it was the day Josselyn & I were released from the hospital. Josselyn's jaundice was much much better (it was now considered medium/low risk). We were told to just put Josselyn by a window during the day to get sun light & then I was told to feed her every 2 hours. Now let me just say that it is very difficult feeding a baby every 2 hours! By the time she finished one feeding it was time to feed her again! I did not want Josse to end up back in the hospital so I followed this schedule for 2 days until we went back to our follow up doctors appointment. At that appointment they weighed Josselyn and because she had plenty of fluids her jaundice was now almost gone & she was back up to her birth weight (that is really rare, babies have 2 weeks to go back up to their birth weight not 2 days lol). Josselyn basically gained almost 3 ounces a day while she was at home (most babies gain 1/2 ounce a day lol). Josselyn left the hospital at 7lbs 1oz and two days later was back up to 7lbs 7oz! It was then and there that I realized not only that my kid eats good but I have magical breast milk! After that doctor's appointment we could finally relaxed because our baby was finally, completely healthy!





The next few days we spent resting at home. You would think that Josselyn was a celebrity by how many visitors she had come see her that week. John's parents came from Lubbock, my little brother flew in from Phoenix, she had Auntie Shelley, Auntie Traci & the girls come all the way from Midland and tons and tons of family & friends from the Dallas area drop by to see her :) It is pretty incredible how loved this little girl is already! It has been a bonus for both Josselyn and I that John was able to have 2 weeks off from work!!! So Daddy has been home with us this whole time.

Uncle Derek came to visit from Phoenix

Auntie Jen, Auntie Lala & Auntie Sette

Josse had tons of visitors this night
Auntie Shelley, Auntie Traci & the girls came from Midland to see Josse

Now the majority of our time has been at home but we have managed to venture out a little. Besides going to doctor's appointments for both baby and Momma, Josselyn's first outing was on Labor Day at 10 days old. We went for a quick trip, guess where... the MALL! We were only there for about an hour but Josselyn was a little angel, she slept the entire time. The following night she went to Invictus for the first time.  She slept through half of the service and then decided that it was time to eat. Her next outing was today and we went to Daddy's work in downtown Dallas.  Josselyn slept the ENTIRE time. As you can see, Josselyn does wonderful at sleeping during the day.  Nights unfortunately are a different story. Some nights Josselyn is wonderful and wakes up just two times to eat, other nights she prefers to hang out with mom and dad during the hours of 2am-6am. We are hoping that our little nocturnal princess will learn the difference between day and night.

Daddy's little girl
Our little princess

At 13 days old, we went to Josselyn's 2 week appointment. Our little girl is growing like a weed. She is now 22 inches tall (which is the 95 percentile for height) and she weighs 8lbs. 4oz. Once again the doctors couldn't believe how much weight Josselyn had gained (for some reason doctors & nurses get really excited when babies gain weight). Her goal was to be back at 7 lbs. 7 oz. which she totally surpassed. The nurses and doctors were quite impressed and they all joked about my "good" breast milk lol. I guess my child will never be malnourished ;) I am not sure how John and I ended up with a tall child...maybe this is just a little growth spurt or maybe she will be tall like her Auntie Amy. Either way she is healthy and doing great THANK YOU JESUS!


I can not forget to mention Josselyn's FIRST BATH! It was at 13 days old and she absolutely hated it. Josselyn thought being wiped down with a wet wash cloth was bad enough but she really hated being in her baby bath partially submerged in water! Daddy did the dirty work and I just sat back and felt bad for poor Josse. Auntie Christina took pictures of this first time experience and Auntie Jen....well Auntie Jen basically hid in my closet so she would not be in any pictures lol. Anyways Josselyn ended up clean as a whistle but as mad as can be!




Well today was a very full day! We had Josselyn's newborn pictures this morning. They started off great!!! Our little princess slept so the photographer was able to capture some amazing shots. Then out of no where Josse decided that she was tired of being photographed naked so she PEED on our bed! Oh but that's not all then she decided to POOP while I am holding her!!! It was the most awful projectile poop that I had ever seen, it got everywhere! Things only got worse...Josselyn then decided that she was hungry so she started crying. I fed her just enough to hold her over (or so i thought) and when we came down stairs to wrap up the pictures & Josse started screaming bloody murder, so we could not take any more pictures :( DISASTER....I am hoping that there are some good pictures form the beginning of the session.


Luckily things ended on a much happier note. Tonight we went to my brother & sister in laws (Joey & Stacey) house for dinner. After dinner they brought out a "Happy 2 week" cake for Josse & they had apple cider for toasting. We had a wonderful time celebrating little Josse's 2 week birthday :) I am looking forward to all of her birthday's in the future!

Happy 2 week Birthday Josselyn


Well that is a little update over the past 2 weeks. Things have been a bit of a blur but I am trying to soak in every moment of every day. I still can not believe that we have this incredible baby girl. She is so perfect in every way and I love her more than I can even explain. She melts my heart every time I look at her & I can not even begin to imagine life without her. John & I both feel like we are dreaming because this all feels to good to be true. The Lord has truly blessed us with the most precious gift in the world & we are going to do everything we can to raise her to be an incredible world changer for the Kingdom of God!



I will keep you all posted on our upcoming adventures!